An Update Post That I Can't Find a Good Title For...

That is Hilton Head, by the way.

Life's been the norm lately, but has had the news of some promising excitements in the near future. For Labor Day the boy and I are going to spend the entire weekend together with his awesome family, which never happens with our working scudules nowadays. It's going to be epic.
I've had this hope in my heart for a long time that I might be able to return to Hilton Head for fall break later this month and even though the oppertunity is small, I'm still clinging onto it like crazy. Even though my parents don't live there anymore, it's where I spent the most crucial years of my childhood and going back is going home for me. If not, I'll just drive up to North Carolina to visit my parents and siblings, which will be equally as exciting but I really want to go to the beach. It's been too long.

I just got the news the other day the kids I nanny for are spending half of Decemember and all of January with their Grandma in California. I was first a little upset because that meant I was out of work but after talking to my brother Jeremy for a while, I realized I could go back to Germany with him and his wife Meg in January. They are going for two months but I could only go for one. I'm practically beside myself with joy. I'm praying for more direction, more faith. And I do hope Germany is in my near future.

But right now I'm going to go finish up the dishes and wait for the sweethearts to come home from school. I can't wait for tonight, when I leave late for my boy's house to spend a weekend with his family, including my best friend (his sister).

And that is a little update of my crazy life.

Captured and Kept ii

Fresh Chocolate Cake baked by the best sister in the world

Flipping through vinal at thrift shops, leaving a musty smell on my fingers

Finishing a book that leaves you asking for more, with a cool cup of water

When Jeremy brought me home KitKats from Japan (twas a good day)

The four memories that have been beautifully haunting me today. I am happy.

Music Lately

Thought I'd sample I bit of what I've been loving on lately. I was surprised most of this month's favorites were more a pop than my usual country.

Smiles, Maya

To Live Beautiful

Last night was one of the those nights where life was beautiful. The stars sprinkled the sky above me and the world seemed so perfect. I was surrounded by the people I love most and want to continue to love most. When I finally went to sleep, I didn't want to sleep because this fantasy I am living in is too good to sleep. Because no dream could be better than these sort of nights by the lake of laughing, friendship, good talking, and this beautiful life.

I wish life was this amazing all the time. I can wish it was. But it never is.

When things aren't beautiful there's always the desire to not be happy. Yet I want to learn to live beautiful no matter what life may throw at me.

In James 1 it reads, " Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,"

In trials, as a christian, I wish to learn to love deeper, to believe stronger, to have more joy, and to love more beautiful. Not just when life is beautiful, but when life is a mess. Because there is nothing as wonderful as a beautiful mess.

Because as a Christian, we will suffer. The bible is clear that we will. It's a battle, a fight we must not lose. But we must know this world is not our home and it will try to get us. It won't always be pretty. But we instead live for the world, which is our home. Life beautiful for the place we long for.

There will be things you want to give into. We all will want to give up sometimes. But nothing on the earth can satisfy the pain. Only Jesus. And one day we will be with Him forever, living with Him and all His glory.

But in all we do now, let us persevere. Let us hold tight onto the promise He has promised us.

Let us in rainstorms and happiness, dwell in reality whatever the circumstances.

Let us not look to tomorrow, but treaure this today.

Let us live beautiful.

Q&A

Recently, I asked for your questions. Here, I anwser them. I did not list ones that were asked more than once.

What type of music do you play on your guitar??
I play country music It's always been the genre that fits with my personality and I just plain find joy in it. Most of the songs I play nowadyas are ones I've been writing, but I've always been playing songs by artists such as Carrie Underwood, Faith Hill, Taylor Swift, Sugarland, Mariah Carey, Miranda Lambert, etc. I also, of course, love to play worship music especially by David Crowder.

So, I wanna hear more about your guy…. =)
He's quite a fairytale. See our story {here.} and I was quite amused that almost all of you asked this question (but I toally understand...it's what I'd be asking too).

If there was one thing you could tell every single person in the world, what would it be??
That Jesus Christ saves and He sadisfys and there is  in life but him. So often I see friends, family, and celebrities fall away and search for things that cannot saidfy.  But Christ is everything. Without him, everything is empty. Everything is worthless. Everything is dead.

Name three of your favorite book AND movie characters.
Hmmm...this was actually the hardest question! My favorites are ever-changing but my favorite book characters are Atticus Finch, Winnie-the-Pooh, and Jo March. My favorite movie characters are Batman (from the new one), Rapunzel (from tangled) and Simba (from the Lion King).

Do you have a certain position that you like to fall asleep in?
I always sleep on my left side every night. Actually I can't fall asleep unless I am in the right position, cause it is just what I am used to. Once I had surgrey and had to sleep on my back. It was the worst thing ever.

Jeans/shorts or dresses/skirts?
A bit of both. I never wear skirts for some reason (I just don't...it's unusal). But I LOVE dresses. I wear them whenever I can. Especially sun dresses. But at the same time: nothing is better than some comfy jeans to slip into.

whats a normal day in your life look like?
I wake up, do my devotion, make coffee, wake up the three kiddos I nanny, give the kids breakfast and dress them, drive the kids to school, come home and do any housework or cooking for the day, if I have time I go eat lunch with a friend or read//blog//play music, at 3 I pick up the kids and play with them until their dad comes home from work, I eat dinner, and after dinner I sometimes watch the kids if their dad has work or I go visit my friends and family.

what do you want to be when you grow up?
A Daughter of Christ, wife, mommy and maybe missionary. That's all...ever.

whats your favorite food?
Corn, Chocolate, pastas. Not togther of course....

Thanks for asking! And hey I'll do another one of these...ask ANY questions below.

Smiles, Maya

a love story

A lot of you guys have asked about the guy I am courting right now.

So here, I tell you the story of a girl, boy, lot's of coffee, a small island, and a really big God.

I met this guy in elementary school, and we didn't really hang out. When I was in 8th grade we became good friends. And I fell hard for him. I loved him, but tried to guard at the same time. It was hard because I knew he liked this other girl. So I'd write him letters in my journal, like this one:

Dear Green Eyes,

I think you would be surprised to know you've captured my heart like a theif. You stole it gradually. I cry myself to sleep. I cannot move on, I am stuck liking you. And how I love you! I guess most people would say I am insane but the smell of you captivates me like crazy. My heart is so wild when you barely touch me. Everything about you---your hair, your eyes, your face---shines like the sun in a gloomy place. Everything you've done is innocence to me. I'd love you if you were 100 or 17. I'll love you forever. I'll write my songs for you. I'll pray for your health and I'll hope God will get you through. I can't stop thinking of me and you. None of this ever happened. It never will. None of this might be God's will. I hope you remember that forever. One day perhaps you'll tell me you love me forever, if God wills it, we will be together. and dream.

so this is me finshing how I feel. You'll never read it but still I trying to let go. I'm desprately trying. But inside I ache.

~ Me.

 

Of course I never sent them, but I sure wanted too. When I was in 9th grade he asked me to dance for the first time at a party. The letter I wrote the next day was quite lovesick:

 

Dear _______,

Today something happened that has never happened before. You asked me to dance. In those few precious moments I did something I have never done before. I feel in love. In love with you. It was like you were the only real thing in the world and your giant eyes looked at me with such a look I got all fuzzy inside. I felt the hopeless romantic feelings return and my heart begain to dance inside of me.

Tonight as I was walking the dog(I hate her by the way) I could not stop dreaming of you. Your perfect smile. Your gorgeous laugh. I was so in love I could not sleep. SO I wrote you this letter. A lovesick letter from a lovesick girl.

Tomorrow is the next day of school. Even though it won't be a dance party like last night, it will be for me.
Can't wait to see you there.

Your lovesick girl,
Maya M.

These one-sided feelings went on forever. Then one day he moved away from our island home and went to something called college. So I missed him and missed him. We'd write and I just waited in fear for the day when he would write to say he had a girlfriend. But he never did. There were rough moments when I'd give up on him or fall in love with someone else, but it was always back to him.

Around the time I was 17, we started writing hand-written letters to each other and it was a lot of fun and I felt like I was holding to something that wasn't there. I sturggled a lot.

A few months ago we spent some time together and he ended up asking me if I was interested in praying to see if God wanted us together. I was overwhelmed and didn't say anything. I couldn't believe the guy I'd wanted and loved for so long was actually confessing his love to me.

So I spent the next few months praying to God if a courtship was His plan for me and him.

The next summer we went a mission trip together with some others. It was hard being with him all the time, I was sure he didn't like me anymore.

 

So one morning I went down to the  beach and prayed for almost an hour and wrote down in my journal, "Lord, whoever you have for me, whenever that might be....let them come in your timing. Because I give my love life to you."

 

Later that day, he asked me out to a cafe' in Germany and told me there he truly had feelings for me and been praying. He was shocked I told him I was doing the same. Apparantly all these years he had no idea I loved him. And he had liked me too all this time and I had no idea. It was a moment I'd wanted for forever.  

So the past few months have been filled with rain showers, happiness, and laughter. Every day I love him more and miss him more when he's not by my side. But I am trusting God through every moment.

And that's it. For now ;)

It's Thursday

Warm Cinnamon rolls//cold coffee+kidds snuggling in my arms//reading blogs for the first time in months, scrolling through all the wonderous posts I've missed//chatting with my sister, em//not doing the work I should//going to hang with some friends tonight//quoting myself//learning to cook a bit//sunlight on my face from the window//laughing out loud alone (it's awkward. really...)//wishing I could have red-haired kids one day//the sound of the creaking door//never finished stories//life.

It's Thursday, folks. Enjoy it.

P.S. Keep asking me all the questions you want. And for all you interested: tomorrow comes a full post on him. So tune in ;)

Announcing+Giveaway

 

 

I am pleased to announce the launch of Maya Moore: Graphic Design.

It's graphic design for the everday blogger (that's you my friend).

So if I were you I'd stop reading this and head over there.

Or...you could enter the giveaway below:

Free Mega Blogger or Wordpress design from Maya Moore (not usually free).

Includes:
//Custom Header
//Custom Fonts
//Custom Colors
//Blog Button
//Favicon
//Custom Sidebar
//Welcome Graphic
//Background
//Signature
//Navabar and Attrubtion removed

to enter:

//Comment below
//must be follower of Efflorescence
//must be follower of Maya Moore: Graphic Design
//Extra: follow me on twitter or order something from the site or blog about it.

Smiles, Maya

Captured and Kept I

Skateboard parks in the middle school days

Messy hair+traveling Europe on cloudy days

Afternoon naps when you don't sleep, just think about Beautiful Jesus.

Sad songs when your loving someone who doesn't care a thing

Those rocks growing up.

Treasured and kept. a thousand memories. One second and it's all gone. But it's a beautiful aftermath.

Captured and kept, inspired by this post, is a new link-up I am beginning on wendsdays. Feel free to link up here.

ask me, ask me, ask me

I'm gonna do a post to anwser all the questions my readers might wonder.

So, here's the deal : ask me anything.

Anything includes awkward questions, funny ones, serious ones, etc.

ASK me whatever. Go, comment. I'll anwser every one, no matter what it is.

So go ask...

Smiles, Maya

"Maybe it’s sad that these are now memories. And maybe it’s not sad."

Hot tea and early morning nostalgia.

Waltzing the New York streets with my bestie.

The smell of starbucks; The smell he smells after work everyday.

The first time we played guitar together, just us and the forever sound of music...

These are some things I've captured and remembered. Moments only last a second but shape the rest of our lives. They become those things called memories. Ah, I love the memories I have. Happiness.

Just Today

You know what I just thought? Today's thoughts, feelings, and adventures will never happen again. It's just today once. Today is the first day of the rest of my life. It's just today...today.

Today the world seems foggy, perfect, yet confusing. Maybe it's the weather, since it's all foggy and cloudy here. I woke up this morning, smiling.  I knew it would be one of those saturdays I wake up and go to sleep singing. So I went bike riding, with the perfect morning air. I swear there is something enchanting about the morning.

Today was and will be a day of music. I strummed my guitar on the porch, playing my share of Matt Kearney to the neighborhood. Then I listened to my share of musical artisits. This had included some good ol' Phil Wickman, and Taylor Swift's newest (Not her best, but still good), and my new love for the Imagine Dragons. I think tomorrow I'll love something else, but each day has it's beautiful playlist.

The perfect fanatsy I've been dreaming of is slowly becoming a reality. I'm not sure I ever imagined life would be this pretty, yet so harsh. Don't take me wrong, I've suffered my entire life, but God's shaped me and taught me. This season of my life is a good one, sprinkled with all the sunshine and happiness I can muster.

Today, I feel like loving someone. I feel like forgiving someone. I feel inspired. I feel free. Today, I feel on top of the world. I feel like being in a room with a thousand people or a mountain alone. Today I feel likes jsut today and I can conquar the universe.

Just today.

Nobody said it was going to be easy...

Growing up careers we're like ice cream flavors. You could pick whatever you wanted and all were equally as amazing. You were told being a teacher, doctor, policeman, firefighter, or athlete were some of the best careers. It all sounded so easy to me.

Nobody ever said it was going to be easy.

Starting high school, I realized I had so much to learn. I learned to study and realized it was going to matter now. Growing up, school seemed easy.

Nobody said it was going to be easy.

Romance in fairy tales looked so easy, so perfect, so clear. Prince Charming always showed himself at the right time in the right place. So I always thought he would show himself in the perfect time.

Well, Nobody said it was going to be easy.

But not alone, I go through life. I seek new mountains, dreams fill my mind. I dance through each day, going through fire and fear. Sure, nobody said it was going to be easy. Everyone said it was going to be hard. But life is easy when you let your mind run to Him. Yet the world is hard, but nobody said it was going to be easy.

Becoming passionate

The three kiddo's officially are sent off to school, leaving me a lonely nanny until I see their faces at three. Meanwhile, I've been learning to be a housekeeper. For the first time in my life, I am completely responsible for all the chores, cleaning, and cooking. Honestly, I've never called my mom as much wanting tips. I never realized how much a mother does. I've learned how important loving is, how much time little things like mending takes,  and how the little things make all the difference.

When I think about the kind of Mother I want to be one day and the kind of nanny I am becoming now one word comes to mind :Passionate. I want to be passionate about my kids, my family, my work. I don't want to care about if I did not sleep much or did not have any time by myself. I am to always be there, always caring, always wanting to care and resolve the argument. So I made a little promise to myself for these kids now and my own in years to come:

I want to be Passionate:

in loving them,

In caring for them,

In cooking for them,

In always scarring away the monsters,

In never breaking a promise,

In all the pillow forts we can build,

In teaching them,

In being patient with them,

In letting them dream,

In letting them cry when they need to cry,

In listening to them,

In correcting them and giving them discipline,

In being an example for them,

In directing them in life,

In being their best friend,

In exploring their talents and personality,

In always telling the truth to them,

In letting them grow up and fly away,

In kissing and hugging them,

In constantly pointing them to Christ,

In never giving up.

That's my goal as a nanny, a mother, and even a grandmother.

Oh, I just love those kiddos.

Smiles, Maya 

I wanted to use my music for the world.

My whole life all I wanted was to sing. I wanted to use my music for the world to change. Really, I had this image of me being the best singer in the world. It's not that I don't still love music but I realize now all my dreams have changed. I don't want to be famous, but I still love music. Now that I live with the family I nanny for a barely ever pick up my guitar and sing. It's not the same it was back home but it's nevertheless I still have that desire to play.

 Last night me and my two best friends went downtown and I got to play a little. I have not done that in years and I forgot how fun it was to jam. I love music more than anything. And it was amazing. Actually is was awesome how much fun I had with just my guitar. So today I pulled it out and played for the kiddo's when they came home from school. They loved it and begged for more. Of course I agreed.

Music is offically back in my life and oh how I missed it! I think I'm gonna go play some now...

A Favorite Quote

“We plan our lives according to a dream that came to us in our childhood, and we find that life alters our plans. And yet, at the end, from a rare height, we also see that our dream was our fate. It's just that providence had other ideas as to how we would get there. Destiny plans a different route, or turns the dream around, as if it were a riddle, and fulfills the dream in ways we couldn't have expected.” -Ben Okri